A Non Human Response Computer Program

We all know the frustration of dealing with a computerized response to a customer service question when the telephone program won’t allow you to speak to a real live person and the canned response doesn’t answer your question or solve your problem by referring you to option 1 or 2 or 4, but now we have to deal with the vileness of virtual email responses.

That’s right folks, some computer programming genius convinced that he has all the answers is now responding to our plaintive pleas for help via email with a programmed response. Don’t think I am telling you the truth – try asking for a manager in an email reply when your question isn’t answered or your problem solved.

These geniuses are convinced they can give us canned answers that are not responsive to our questions and that we will have no choice, but to accept them.


If I can be of assistance to you in the future, please don’t hesitate to contact me.

But they didn’t answer my question or solve my problem. I will spare you the details. All they did was give me excuses as to why they couldn’t help me and then end by offering to help me in the future. I will not be pacified by such nonsense. I want real answers from a real person; someone who can think on his feet without referring to a data bank for the wrong answer once he thinks he has profiled me. We can’t be stereotyped so easily, can we?

What does some computer program really know about me, or you for that matter: our passions, our wants, our desire to overcome the obstacles that constrain us.

I ended my reply email by asking to speak to a manager before I print this article. If you are reading this now I have not spoken to or heard from a manager by email or any other means of communication known to man such as by mail or telephone, but then what would some virtually vile software program know about a request from me that they could not possibly have anticipated or stored in their knowledge bank.

They probably don’t have human managers, only programs.

My question to you my friends is are we going to sacrifice out individuality to the machinations of some computer program designed to save the institution in question money and drive us crazy in frustration, and if not what are we going to do about it?

Would only real people please respond to my question?